In class this past week, a student mentioned one of her former English teachers. That instructor, it seems, had a propensity to leave paper drafts dripping in red ink and had a few favorite editorial marks including the marginal note of “awk” (which means awkward). My student was put off by this as she reflected. Why didn’t the instructor just correct her grammar and be done with it, the student wondered. I pointed out that an awkward sentence is often still grammatically correct; however, it may not flow well because of strange phrasing order, choice of words, use of tone or voice, or placement within the rest of a paragraph. And sometimes we don’t know why a sentence is awkward when we read it…but we know it is.

I was reminded that a good instructor will meet his/her students at their awkward communication points and do more than just point out the awkwardness. A really good instructor will help students explore the reasons behind the awkwardness and help them become more graceful communicators.

In personal writing revision this past week, I was looking over some old feedback on my novel manuscript. There were points where beta readers and editor friends could give me specific feedback (this statement is trite and unbelievable, you misspelled the name of that place, etc.). But there were other points where all they could say was, “That just doesn’t sound right to me,” or “Your tone in this dialog is choppy and canned,” or “I don’t know what needs to happen here – but change something!” I accepted and reviewed every bit of feedback, but those general and vague comments simply pointing to the awkwardness of something, something they could not put their finger on, that got me. I had to review each spot critically and wrestle with what – if any – changes I would make.

I was reminded that a good writer doesn’t give up when the reader tells him/her some part of the writing is hampered, even though they can’t say exactly why. A really good writer will evaluate it calmly and not take it personally, looking for a way to make the end product better and more edifying to the prospective audience – because he/she believes that the edification of the reader is paramount.

In personal communication this past week, I felt moved in my heart to say and write some words that were not easy. And the results of following my conscience were painful on all sides. I still feel I did the right thing. But sometimes honesty reveals brokenness, fear, dissatisfaction, pride, frustration, or tension. And all of these things can open a chasm of awkwardness between two or more people who are trying to communicate. This led me to think of all the times in my past when physical, emotional, and even spiritual awkwardness caused rifts in my relationships that were never completely mended. And it made me weep.

Yet, I was reminded that a good God doesn’t give up on us when we make mistakes, when we do what we know we should do but find the response leaves us out in the cold, and when our whole lives feel like one big, knotted, clumsy mess of the regretful, the unloveable, the awkward. A really good God, in fact, steps down into the mess and meets us in our awkwardness, redeeming it all in some miraculous way to still use us for His glory.

He is never awkward. And so, it is His face alone that we must seek to heal and grow in gracefulness.